Sunday, June 11, 2006

Happy Anniversary, Hon...

...or, the Day Five Hormonal Meltdown, in retrospect.

Don't anyone call the counseling center or anything. I'm including this bit of reality to balance the smug flower-arranging post from earlier. Hey, I'm human, too.

My pregnancy books say that today is the D-Day of the postpartum period. A woman's hormone levels drop precipitously in a cascade of tears and irrational thinking. I've always been one to scoff at other women's PMS complaints. Out of control? How predictable. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

I was holding it all in pretty well. I bit my tongue when every visitor praised my husband for watching Andrew--and he acted like it was some well deserved glory. (Well what do you think I do all day, every day?) I didn't hang up on the endless stream of phone calls which interrupted every nap opportunity, or even the faraway friend who wanted me to get a pencil to write down a different call-back number. Can't you hear the hysterical baby in the background, buddy? I quietly made myself a peanut butter and jelly when I noticed the last two servings of lasagna (and the accompanying breadsticks, and also the cookies) had mysteriously vanished right before I sat down to eat.

It was putting our daughter in the bili-bed for jaundice that did me in. I heard her high-pitched crying, her little eyes begging to be held and nursed and comforted--and that dam of resentment broke. Woe be to the husband who stood unknowingly at the floodgate. I'm pretty sure I did everything except demand the D-word.

Did I mention tomorrow's our anniversary? Time for the seven year itch, my mother so helpfully reminded me, with a sidelong glance at my stretchmarks.

Hope I have enough energy to whip up some humble pie for dessert.

18 comments:

Gen said...

Awww, poor babe! Hugs to you! I'll be keeping you and your family in my thoughts... Hopefully things will feel brighter tomorrow.

Mrs Blythe said...

The 'baby blues' just seem to sneak up on us don't they? I remember just gently growling at everything, with brief outbursts of frustration. It was worse with baby2 because baby1 took advantage of the fact that I was immobile whilst breast-feeding and so would roam around looking for something to spill or rip. Lol. In your picture, are they photo albums as a gift for your husband? What a lovely idea. Blessings to you and your family :o)

Queen of Carrots said...

Don't you hate being irrational, and *knowing* you're being irrational, and yet still being irrational? Hope you have a lovely anniversary notwithstanding. :-)

Beck said...

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that you're having a rough time right now! The baby blues are rough, but they do pass in a day or two - hang in there!

Jordana said...

Hang in there. There are rough patches in there at times. In fact, after my second child I had the worst of the rough patches that I've had.

I hope you have a happy anniversary any way.

And those stretch marks are signs of your marriage and what you've done together to build a family. At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Anonymous said...

It kind of balances you, to cry; glad you were able.

I thought that stack of albums were fresh bamboo pipes, then of course remembered your earlier post...maybe too many hormones over HERE, today!

Anonymous said...

Meredith-
I am laughing out loud as I read your post. Boy, have I been there and done that!! But the other gals are right, it will pass, so just hang in there on those days when you don't feel like it will. And try to do what you can to brighten your day and make yourself feel better- I think it helps to get away for just a little while and cry or blow off some steam. And stay connected to your flesh-and-blood friends at church and in the community. Those that have children themselves will be there to love you, to listen, to nod knowingly because almost every mom has been through this! Hope Elise is soon done with th billi light, and that things begin to get back to "semi-normal" around your house.
Susan in Illinois :-)

Shannon said...

Happy Anniversary! The hormone rollercoaster is awful! But it's not so bad to remind people that moms are people, too. We could use a little of the special consideration we give everyone else sometimes. And don't you worry about that 7 year itch - most couples from our generation start itching well before 7 years, so you're ahead of the game:)

Donna said...

Oh bless your heart. "Jonah" days can be overwhelming sometimes. And I'd like to "smack" the person who started that 7 year itch MYTH. I'd wager that you'll feel more like yourself a week from now.

Anonymous said...

Meredith,

Great to know you're human! Seriously, we all can identify with you. This, too, shall pass!

Nine Recliners said...

Meredith,

Every time I see a photo of your house ... clean surfaces, complementary colors, an aura of peace ... I get inspired.

And I've even been acting on it! After reading this post, I actually straightened our coat closet. A bit, anyway.

When I read your 'small kitchen' post, I cleared off one counter ... AND THE FRIDGE. I have even told the kids, "Nothing on my fridge! Your artwork can go on the fridge in the rec room!!!" And the kitchen does look better ... and bigger.

So, cry when you have to, but, overall, you are building a haven.

And you're inspiring some of us to work in that direction too.

Mom2fur said...

7 year itch--what a CROCK. I'm married 25 years and we've been together a total of 34 years!!!! Do either of us look? Of course we do...and if my husband points out that someone is attractive, I'm not bothered by it at all. My tubby tummy and stretch marks bother me, but he still thinks I'm s*xy--even being about 40 pounds heavier than when we were married. You will have a great wedding anniversary, the baby blues will pass, and all will be well.
Meantime, sending love and hugs your way!

LynnMarie said...

This too shall pass. You are human and every now and again, it's OK to remind your family of that fact. There is no 7 year itch. Been married for 34 years now and our love grows deeper and stronger. You and your family will be fine, just keep your humor side turned on.

Anonymous said...

I felt sentimental, stressed and emotional over the weekend because of things going on with distant family members. I found myself being short with my husband and could tell he didn't appreciate it. He had no clue what was on my mind either & probably wondered why I was being grumpy. I realized what I was doing. I found a quiet minute and told him what was on my mind and apologized for taking it out on him. Then I told him I needed him to help me get through it. He still couldn't exactly understand how to handle it, but at least he knew what was going on and that he could help if at all possible. :)

Coffee and a Muffin said...

Oh, (((Meredith)))! Well, here's to being normal (not Dave Ramsey's version, thankfully!).

Alison said...

Hang in there! I know that you know it will pass, but sending smiles and hugs nonetheless. Hope your husband and your mom are remembering to "baby" you too--and that you are letting them--if not, please try asking one of them to bring you the next meal or drink that you need. Being a loving, competent wife, mother and homemaker doesn't mean you don't need to be taken care of sometimes too. Love, Alison

momxtwo said...

Happy Aniversary!

I suffered from postpartum depression really bad with my second child. I was crying all day everyday. I thought It would never stop.

Peace

Anonymous said...

Hey there. Giving birth is tough. Just think about it! Carrying and producing a live human being from one's body! You cry and boo-hoo all that you want, Meredith. In a few weeks, things will look up.